So This Is How The Lovebug Works
by CalCarrie
Summary: These are the clues that slap you in the face when you realize that your best friend is the one you'll ultimately fall in love with. SS/ET. AU
1. Clue Number 1

A/N: Hey guys! So this is gonna be just a series of one-shots. It's not a continuing story and will only be updated when the plot bunnies in my head are getting too rowdy. :)) Sorry if it's not that good. This was just a spur-of-the-moment thing! So that means it's probably not a CHRONOLOGICAL series of one-shots, okay?

Hope you like it!

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**Clue No. 1: **

**You cover for her/him when she's/he's on one of his/her retarded schemes.**

**_Age 15/16_**

Li Syaoran regretted going to this dinner. Seriously.

Don Kanonji had been a business partner of his family—and Sakura's family—for a long long LONG time. They've been buddies since preschool. They were still buddies in college. They were buddies during the birth of their respective businesses. They were still buddies when they hit paydirt. They'll probably STILL be buddies until the Apocalypse… or 2012.

Naturally, three families who've been friends since the Jurassic Era often have dinner together in one or the other's house. Usually, Li ENJOYS these dinners because, hell, Don Kanonji and his family were awesome hosts and the food was excellent and and Kanonji's kids are pretty cool and absolutely lethal on Wii games…

… but he really really REALLY didn't like the dinner being hosted in Don Kanonji's mansion right now.

Because Don Kanonji decided to try a new meal plan.

He decided to go _vegan._

The problem with this meal plan was that Don Kanonji's family chef decided that today was a good day to get diarrhea. Hence, there was no chef. No chef to give the basics about how to cook vegan food. No chef to give directions. No chef to head the kitchen. No chef to actually… well… _cook._

One very inspiring "Top Chef" episode, a weighing scale, and a food magazine later, the one who cooked was Don Kanonji's wife.

She was a sweet, intelligent and cool woman. Seriously. Scarily efficient in her work, loving mother to her kids….

… but she can't cook to save her life.

Hence the reason why Li, after trying and failing to stomach the monstrosity that Mrs. Kanonji called, "Magnificent Vegan Pasta", decided to spare her feelings.

He discreetly collected all the food that was dumped on his plate on a napkin spread out on his lap and, when the timing was right, announced that nature was calling him.

He went to Don Kanonji's special bathroom, balled up the huge mass of uneaten food in a thick roll of tissue paper…and…

Plop.

…dumped it inside the toilet bowl….

Crouched in front of the toilet seat, Li grinned and reached for the flush….

The door stealthily opened.

Li was too caught up on his (premature) victory to notice.

"What are you up to now?"

He froze.

And turned around to see… Sakura. She was looking down on his crouched form in front of the toilet. She had one hand on the doorknob and another on her hips, an amused smirk playing on her lips.

He said the first thing that came to his mind.

"HOW DID YOU KNOW?"

She stepped inside and gave him a dry look. "For someone on the throes of painfully bursting a bladder, you completely bypassed the very available bathroom on the first floor, doofus."

"… I like this bathroom! Don Kanonji has the coolest bathroom in the world, don't you know? He said this toilet seat used to be in Eddie Murphy's house and that shower cap over there came all the way from Timbuktu..."

Sakura started tapping her heels.

Li tried again, trying to look as much of a wounded victim as possible while crouched in front of a toilet seat. "You know, I could've ACTUALLY been taking a piss and with you walking here and all then you would've been blinded by the magnificence of my---!"

WHACK. A toothbrush bounced off his forehead.

".... OW. WHAT THE HELL?"

Sakura stepped inside the bathroom and rolled her eyes. She continued tapping her heels and snorted.

He shifted, running a hand through his hair sheepishly. Shit, his knees were starting to hurt. "See, I thought I saw a bug… a cockroach… near the toilet… and I was… that is…"

He cursed.

She raised an eyebrow.

Li groaned. "ALL RIGHT! I ADMIT! I HATE THE SUPER-VEGAN LOW FAT BUTTER PASTA TOMATO CRAP, OKAY? It was totally disgusting, and the carrots tasted like burned rubber, and I think my stomach just died while trying to ingest those rubbery shit HE calls 'veggie pasta'. I cannot take anymore of that monstrosity and—"

Sakura's eyes widened and, automatically, she locked the door and took a step towards her best friend… her demented best friend. "Please don't tell me…."

"—so I went here to cleanse myself from those evil things—"

"LIIIIIIII SYAORAN—"

"—I dumped it all on the toilet. There!" he admitted, pointing at the huge lump of soggy tissue ball floating merrily in the toilet water.

Sakura flopped down next to him and stared at the toilet bowl her jaw hanging open. "… you are SO dead."

"THEY TOLD ME IT WAS OKAY TO USE THE BATHROOM, OKAY?" he defended, holding a cross sign in front of him to ward off Sakura's incoming rant.

She elbowed him on the ribs ("OW!" Li whined). "NOT FOR THIS, GENIUS!"

"Shhh, you paranoid grasshopper," Li hushed her. "There's a thing called a flush!" He flicked her on the forehead.

Sakura snorted, "dude, if that ball of veggies clogs the toilet and makes it explode on your face…" She trailes of warningly.

He pokes her on the arm. "Oh, shut your pessimistic nature! It's not THAT big."

"… that lump is the size of a freaking baseball."

"BAH. See, I just plunked the stupid thing down… push the thing…watch it swirl around a bit and bask in my brilliance… then…FLUSH! Tada!"

They waited for the telltale sound of water swirling, the slush-slush of toilet water taking the lump out of their sights forever. Sakura stared at the toilet. Li's hand was still on the toilet flush…er…thing.

Li's puffed out chest started to deflate.

"……"

"……"

Sakura politely tapped Li on the shoulder. "Oh, Syaooooran…" she sweetly purred.

The now-sweating heir sported two very wide eyes and a gaping mouth. Let it not be said that the Li Clan scion did hear the warning bells in his head.

Squeak. Squeak.

"…… why is it not flushing…???"

"…"

"Ohcrapohcrapohcrap…"

Sakura sighed and gave him a light shove. "Stand aside, doofus. Let me try…"

Squeak. Squeak.

She threw her hands up in the air and started to stand up.

"… It's jammed. Good luck, man."

Li's hand shot out and stopped her. He used the full force of his Awesome Puppy Dog Eyes. "Pleeeease doooon't gooooo! Help meeeee!"

They stayed like that for a few minutes.

Sakura rolled her eyes and allowed herself to be pulled down, although a small smile inevitably made its way to her mouth. "Liiiii," she pointed out dryly, "… I'm no plumber. I don't know how to fix a toilet flush."

She raised her eyebrows and, to prove her point, repeatedly pulled the metal that should've ended Li's misery

"Crap it all. TRY IT AGAIN!"

"Try it aga—Ok, fine. LOOK. THE FREAKING WATER IS NOT OBEYING MY COMMAND. It-- won't—flush!!!"

"… Reeeaaaally?"

Sigh. "Yeah, look…"

"…Well, shit."

Li ran a hand through his already disheveled hair, his mind undoubtedly going through a hundred different plans at once. He sighed.

He raised his hand and let it hover for a moment at the top of the toilet bowl, his face in a pained but determined expression. Sakura was confused... for a while.

Then it clicked.

She gaped. No way. NO FREAKING WAY. He can't possibly be thinking of…?!

"Oi…Hey… HEY! WHAT THE HELL YOU—? You're not thinking of—?!"

"It's better than facing that schizophrenic lady's wrath!!!"

She grabbed his hand and pulled it out of the air, shaking it in front of his face. "Li," she hissed, "it's a damn toilet! A thing where crappy things go through! Crap things like—oh, I don't know—(flat look) CRAP???"

He shook her off his hand and grinned at her, his mind already made up. "Chill, the water's newly replaced and…yeah, I don't see any… thing… floating around…"

"THIS IS THE OLD MAN'S TOILET PARADISE!" Sakura nearly yelled, waving her arms around to emphasize her point. "Do you have any idea how BIG his shi—!"

Li balked and covered his ears, dramatically shaking his head. "STOOOOP, dammit!" he cringed. "I am trying not to think about that!"

She smacked him upside the head.

"… bask in your freaking brilliance now, bastard."

Li rolled his eyes. "Shut up and find me a tissue…"

"I SHALL NOT BE AN ACCOMPLICE TO THIS STUPID YUCKFEST," Sakura swore, making a motion as if to ward off evil spirits.

"Ah, there's a tissue roll! Okay, I need all of this…"

Li's hand shot out and grabbed a tissue roll behind Sakura, who just slapped a hand to her forehead, feeling the headache coming on.

Still, she tried to reason with him. You know, for the benefit of her best friend's skin.

"Wait, WAIT! There's another way--!"

"Okay, I'm ready!"

"AH! NO, YOU IDIOT, WAI—!" ('I HAVE AN IDEA! STOP!' she tried to yell)

(splash)

Li's hand plunged into the toilet bowl, making a splashy-squishy sound as he tried to get a grip on the wet mass of food.

"…"

"…"

"What the fuck? WHAT THE FUCK?!?!" she hissed, her hands pressed either side of her face. There was a gobsmacked expression on her face.

"WELL, THE FLUSH IS BROKEN! WHAT THE HELL ARE WE SUPPOSED TO DO???" Defensive. Yep, that was SO him.

"Oh, I don't know," she pretended to think deeply. "We could've… let's see… USED A TOILET PLUNGER? A BROOM? A PENCIL? Anything that isn't attached to a human body???!!!"

"… there was no time!"

"Excuses, excuses… pfft."

"Fuck you."

"Oh god, I think I'm gonna be sick."

"…what the hell am I supposed to do with these… abominations?" Li was holding the soggy mess of food on his hand, swinging it around and around and started pushing towards Sakura, who promptly backed away.

"Get them away from me… ew. Dude, it's dripping on the floor."

"Ugh… help me out here…"

They stared at each other… and then at the lump of tissue.

"…"

"..."

Sakura sighed. Li grinned.

"… why am I your best friend again?"

"… because you love me."

"… Correction: I hate you. You shall not let those freakishly disgusting and now permanently tainted hands anywhere on my person. I refuse to have shit smeared on my body."

Still, Sakura Kinomoto was smiling. Li whooped and smirked.

" I love you, too… now, to the TRASH CAN!"

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Read and Review! :D

Lotsa Love,

CalCarrie


	2. Clue Number 2

A/N: Late Christmas present! Haha, my vacation's boring, so I let my mind wander and came up with this. FAIL. It's… well, I don't know what it is. And it's midnight where I am. :D Just read and review, okay?

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**Clue no. 2: The Classic Like/Love/Hate Thing was present even waaaay back.**

**-**

_I remember the first time I met Li Xiao-Lang._

It was in this huge Christmas party held in a fancy hotel, celebrating a corporate hooblah that I can't, for the life of me, remember. I was… five…four? Four. My grandmother forced me to wear this really really cute bubblegum pink dress with the little puffed sleeves and Mary Jane shoes and a cherry-flavored lollipop. It was cute, yeah, but I wasn't allowed to MOVE, because I looked like a freaking porcelain doll, like the ones that your mom would give you but wouldn't let you touch because you'd play with it (since, you know, THAT'S WHAT KIDS DO).

Of course, somewhere between my parents talking to a bald dude and then moving on to talk to a fat dude, boredom bit me. What is up with these tall people? They have no life! Where are the awesome dragons and fairies and Disney shows??? So I kind of wandered off… and then I got lost.

But that wasn't really my concern then. Let me tell you, when you're a cute little kid in a pink dress, the last thing you'd think of is the fact that you're lost in a five-star hotel. Heck, does the term "five-star hotel" even mean anything to cute little kids in pink dresses?

I mean, when you're shorter than the butts of most people in the room, the view tends to be the same anywhere. Butts. Butts. Legs. Butts. Oooh, leg sex. AH-HAH.

Not that… not that I knew what that was back then. Seriously. ANYWAY.

So there I was, waddling around and looking adorable in the way that only kids can do, when I saw him.

He was a little ways away from a couple talking to a guy with long white hair and creepy gold eyes, his brown hair already messy as hell and his little face was already scrunched up in the infamous I-Am-So-Bored-Notice-Me-Or-There-Will-Be-Hell-To-Pay Tantrum. I thought he was an angel. He was that beautiful.

(Right now, he's the Spawn of Satan. Nah, kidding. STILL.)

Hmm. Maybe that's why I ran up to him, poked him and happily chirped, "You're so pretty!"

….........hm.

OKAY. So maybe that wasn't the best descriptions for him but bear with me here. I was A FOUR YEAR OLD KID, OKAY? It wasn't like I use the word "beautiful" all the time. And if I did, it would probably sound like "booteefool" or "byutful" or "Boofull". Bah.

Well, he…. He wasn't impressed. At all. Maybe he thought I was calling him a girly boy? Because I remember he just stared at me and got that frown which ten years later his fangirls would swoon over and call "bad boy mysterious".

So he stared, and then he frowned… and then he scrunched up his little nose…

And then you know what? YOU KNOW WHAT?

He snatched my lollipop and…. and put it in his mouth.

Then he glared at me and turned his back. With my lollipop.

_My _lollipop.

And okay, it's not a pretty big deal now, the whole sharing-food-with-best-friend and all, but we were _four._ This was the beginning of the BOYS-HAVE-COOTIES-EWWW stage.

And I was hungry.

AND HE STOLE MY LOLLIPOP.

After very little contemplation (2.4 seconds), I did what any indignant self-respecting pissed off little girl would do.

I cried.

Like all hell came loose.

Then I kicked him. HARD.

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Of course, that was the day our two whole families got to see each other again after God-knows-how-long focusing on their work and owning/starting/building gigantic corporations. They were all, "It's so good to see you!" and "You have a kid?" and "AWW! He/She/It's so Cute!!" while Li and I glared at each other.

And then they made us apologize.

"Come on, Sakura-chan. Apologize to Xiao-Lang."

"Go on, Xiao-Lang. Be a good boy."

_Ugh. _ Adults.

We looked at each other for about twenty centuries, our mouths slowly opening like they were being manhandled by a crowbar.

"Sorry," I mumbled.

"Sorry," Li grumbled.

After much apologizing from both sides, my parents got into this whole conversation that I do not care to remember, leaving the two of us alone… again.

It was pretty awkward.

We stared at each other. I bet if we had the sense to say it, we would have yelled, "YOU SUCK!" at the same time.

We settled for making faces.

The next meeting, we settled our kiddie war with a fierce snowball battle… and then we found a common ground in our love for eating caramel bars and driving our mothers mad with our death-defying 'adventures' outdoors.

I know it's cheesy and stupid and absolutely freakishly weird but…

_Suffice to say, it was the start of our friendship._

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_**More than a few years later**_

It was the same day. Same hour. Same Christmas-y air, only not so boring anymore. It was only a few minutes before Christmas. The Li household was a flurry of activity; hundreds of voices were heard as the main family hosted its now-traditional Christmas ball in the grand ballroom. Their laughter echoed throughout the whole place and mingled with the joyful music in an energetic frenzy. It was very obvious that the party was still in full swing.

Out in the garden, a very tired but exhilarated Sakura Kinomoto enjoyed a few moments of solitude, a smirk playing across her lips as she recalled that fateful moment so many years ago.

Hmm. Good Times with a capital "G" and "T".

"God, you look like someone kicked your puppy in the curb."

She didn't even need to turn around to know who it was. Her smirk already turned into a grin as her best friend came to a stop beside her. Peeking at him from the corner of her eye, she didn't see the little boy who grabbed her snack. No kiddy limbs and fat chubby cheeks, sir. Quite the opposite really.

"Just thinking," Sakura admitted, answering his unasked question. "You remember the first time we met?"

Li suddenly guffawed, and she saw a hint of the boy she remembered (she smiled at that, hoping it won't go anywhere ever). His amber eyes lightened and his body— now all muscle and power and strength—shook slightly.

"How could I?" he asked, running a hand through his messy brown hair. "You mauled me!" he exclaimed.

"Li, I kicked you, not gouge your eyes out. There's a difference!"

"Bah, technicalities. You still assaulted me."

"Ooooh, bruised your ego?" she asked innocently.

He scoffed. "Hardly, it was just annoying." Then he stopped and grinned mischievously. "Besides, you called me 'pretty'. In my experience, that means 'cute' in kiddie language."

Not missing a beat, she piped up brightly, "I thought you were a girl!"

Li started to snigger, until he saw the perfectly straight face that Sakura was struggling to hold. He stared at her, his handsome face gaped.

"… are you kidding me?"

His indignant defense of his manhood died on his lips when she suddenly laughed and shoved him lightly. "Got you," she smirked. "You are such a narcissist!"

He huffed, although he was now grinning. "Am not."

They were still in it when, out of nowhere, the sound of ringing bells suddenly rang clear and loud. It was heard over the music, the laughter and everything else. It was church bells ringing.

Suddenly, the telltale signs of a firecracker being ignited were heard. They both tilted their heads up just in time for them to see the first of the pyrotechnics whiz up in the air and create a shower of dazzling lights.

In contrast to the cheering crowd, the little secret garden was quiet, the two not-so-teenage-anymore friends just enjoying the view in each other's company.

Sakura Kinomoto suddenly laughed, linking her arms Li Xiao-Lang.

The heir quirked an eyebrow. "What?" he asked warily.

Turning to face him, she poked him in the nose.

"Merry Christmas, Li," Sakura said merrily, tiptoeing up and kissing him in the cheek. Her green eyes crinkled with the smile on her face.

With that face, her hair flowing down freely and her lithe figure draped in a beautiful gown of emerald green, Li decided that she was far _far far_ from the snot-nosed little kid he met more than a decade ago.

Xiao-Lang grinned, kissing her on the forehead and ignoring the spot in his cheek that was just a _little_ bit colder when her lips left it. Right now, he settled for hugging his best friend.

This, he decided, was better than a kick in the shins.

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A/N: Read and Review! MERRY CHRISTMAS AND ADVANCED HAPPY NEW YEAR!

I don't know. I mean, if I can get my butt up maybe I can update next week for the New Year Chapter. :D Haha.

Anyway, THANK YOU!

Later and Lotsa Love,

Calcarrie


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